Sarra Edwards | bringing balance into motherhood
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The Blended Family Chronicles

9/30/2017

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I don't know of any girl who grows up thinking, "I really want to be a stepmom when I get older!"

And it's not just the "wicked stepmother" stereotype that is deeply engrained in our culture. 

It is missed firsts.
It's coming second.
It is balance and compromise like nothing else.
It is a risk.

Ah, but life is full of risk. And if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.

In 2015, in the course of 4 weeks, I moved from a small trailer in the middle of nowhere, where I lived only with my dog and my ever-growing baby bump, to a home in the city with my fiancé, his son (every second week) and, shortly after, our newborn baby. Less than a year later, our niece moved in with us.

It was (and still is) a life of huge adjustments, daily learning, and uncomfortable growth. 

It is more laundry in a week than I used to do in a month. It is structure and routine and sports practices, when I, not so long ago, could binge-watch an entire Netflix series in a weekend. It is conversations at midnight about our parenting and whether we're doing a good job.

Fellow stepmoms - if you are feeling overwhelmed (or know that you will feel those feelings again) - hang in there. It's not easy, but you are strong and capable. 

Our family is built on risk and change and growth. It's not perfect, but it is worth it.

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Homemade Peanut Butter Cups

9/21/2017

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What's a girl gonna do when she's cutting sugar and craving a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup?!

Obviously, I would attempt to make a version at home with healthy fats and a plant-based sweetener! 

Try it out, let me know your thoughts!

Ingredients
  • 1/4 cup natural peanut butter (I used Kraft's All Natural with Sea Salt - yum!)
  • 1/4 cup coconut oil
  • 1 ounce unsweetened baking chocolate
  • 1 tablespoon cocoa
  • 1/2 teaspoon stevia drops
  • Muffin tray and liners

Instructions

  1. Place liners in the muffin tray.
  2. Completely melt peanut butter, coconut oil, baking chocolate, and cocoa in double broiler.
  3. Remove from heat and stir in liquid stevia.
  4. Pour into liners. Freeze until hardened.
  5. Store in airtight container in the freezer.
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The Minimalism Game: Day 13

9/13/2017

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Hi, I'm Sarra and sometimes I suck at commitment. To my blog, anyway.

I've continued to be committed for the past few days to the Minimalism Game ... I just haven't been able to make the time to write about it. Whoops. 

It's getting easier every day to say, "Yeah, I don't need this crap." It's getting easier to separate the sentimental value I feel from obligation to keep things I don't really want. I'm making room for more happiness. More time. More experiences. More adventures. 

I feel happier in my home.
I feel more productive every day.
​I feel good. 

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The Minimalism Game: Day 8

9/8/2017

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 I spent a ridiculous amount of time today brainstorming a tagline for my life coaching business.
  • I teach busy women to create direction and discipline in their lives. (blah)
  • I help women make their dreams a reality. (ugh)
  • I work with busy moms to create BALANCE, DIRECTION, and DISCIPLINE. (meh)

In reality? I want to help women align their passions with their actions. I want to help moms balance the #momlife/ME time struggle. I want to help you get your shit together. 

Ok, I'll keep working on it.
Today, I returned 8 bags of recycling (and walked out $54 richer). I also recycled a ridiculous amount of bottles from our bathroom. 
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The Minimalism Game: Day 7

9/7/2017

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- Birthday invitations from the 80s
- Labels with my name printed on them from elementary school
- A swim badge
- A journal/notebook of quotes, in which I inscribed in the cover, "This is not for any him. This is for me."
- A "Block Parent" version of Snakes and Ladders
- Birthday blower things
- A bag of rocks
- A Canadian flag
- A tiny clip-on koala
- Bottlecap glasses

​Things that are no longer in my house.
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The Minimalism Game: Day 6

9/6/2017

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I knew when I had a baby that my life would be forever changed. 

I knew I'd love more and get less sleep.
I knew that my body would change and that I would change a lot of diapers.
I knew that I wanted to be a certain person as a mother; I knew that I would be a work-in-progress.
I knew that labour would be a challenge. I knew that it would be worth it. 

I didn't know how freakin' much I'd love this tiny person that I grew.
I didn't know that I would look at her 2 years later and marvel at the fact that she lived inside of me for 9 months.
I didn't know that the idea of having another baby someday would cause me so much turmoil.

And I didn't know that my feet would grow 1/2 a size, causing me to give away 6 of my favourite pairs of shoes (after hoping and praying for 2 years that my shoe size would shrink).

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The Minimalism Game: Day 5

9/5/2017

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It's a full moon tonight. It arrives at 3:02 a.m on September 6th. 

Many people believe in the power of the Full Moon. There are rituals and symbolic practices around releasing, unburdening yourself, letting go. How perfectly aligned with my project in purging our home of the items that do not serve us. 

I wrote out my stresses, my emotions... the inner stuff that I wish to release. And then I burned that shit. I filled this glass jar with water and I stuck it outside with my crystals and I let that hippie part of me out. I sat and I said my intentions and I set free the things that do not serve me. 


​As for our game... today, I sent off something to my mama, a gift that has been in our house for months. 1 item.

Then, I returned 5+ doilies to my mother-in-law, from my de-doily-fying of our home. For some reason, my husband had doilies all over the place when I moved in and a couple weeks ago, I reached my doily limit. No more doilies.

Also, I read an article today about my former students who were killed last year and cried. That's probably why this is all over the place. If you'd like to honour their memory, you can read the article here and watch the short video on facebook here.

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The Minimalism Game: Day 4

9/4/2017

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Today, I almost cried in my front yard watching my 2 year old play because I know that I am going to wake up one day and she'll be 20; time goes by so fast.

I came inside the house and collected some random junk.
  • A monkey in a banana that an ex-boyfriend won me 
  • 2 containers of Play-Doh
  • A leia left over from Olivia's birthday party 2 months ago
  • A lanyard
  • A pen with a light-up end that doesn't light up anymore
  • A Japanese ribbon
  • A basket from an Okinawan co-worker 

More than 4 things. Once you start, it's hard to stop.

Aaaaand, today's motherhood rant:

Motherhood is not a competition. Like, damn.

If you're doing the best you can, that's all that freakin' matters. Your kids need a happy mom, not a perfect one.
For my family, it means I workout (so I don't strangle someone #stressrelief) but sometimes I only shower once a week. It means sometimes we eat organic, home cooked meals and sometimes we survive on hot dogs and Chex cereal. It means if 1 room in our house is clean, there's probably 2 that could get us featured on Hoarding: Buried Alive. It means that sometimes my toddler watches too much TV because my business to-do list is a little too long.

So, whatever making yourself happy looks like for YOUR family... celebrate your badass self, mama.

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The Minimalism Game: Day 3

9/3/2017

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I love my husband. He jumps on board unquestioningly whenever I have ideas from starting a business to getting rid of a bunch of shit we don't need to ordering Chinese food for dinner. But he doesn't do anything half-assed. So, as I'm sloooowly going through our house, determining what possessions brings me joy and what I can live happily without, he's throwing away hundreds of things a day. 

He drives me crazy some days, but there is no doubt that he is the person who balances me. 

I'm neurotically early, he's perpetually late.
I'm a researcher, determined to make my decisions on the best Chinese food (ok, I really want Chinese food) to the best potty-training method based on as much information as possible. He is spontaneous and leads with his gut.
I've got a quick temper and I've only ever seen him really angry once. 

And I'm trying to have enough stuff to get rid of over the next 30 days, and he's throwing shit away like there's no tomorrow. 

(And for the record, I threw away some Christmas decorations, a half-used Easter egg decorating kit, and a puzzle that my sister made in high school.)


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The Minimalism Game: Day 2

9/2/2017

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Let's be honest. I may be seriously regretting this decision on Day 20.

But, here we have 2 garbage bags of clothes, donated to The Kidney Foundation of Canada for day 2 of the Minimalism Game. Olivia insisted on coming along for the ride, rather than stay with her daddy, because she has serious case of FOMO (aka Fear Of Missing Out), especially when it comes to her mama. Hopefully, her separation anxiety doesn't come into play when I tackle her room (there's got to be at LEAST 100 things to get rid of in there).

I could have broken these bags down and counted the items, but they've been sitting in my living room for weeks and my house for much longer and I am happy to have them gone.

(Please disregard the fact that there are bags and bags of infant clothes in my basement and garage that I continue to save in case of future baby girls.)
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